Reader,
I have recently been discussing the subject of parents in football with coaching colleagues, and issues relating to parental involvement seem to be on the rise in sports in general.
Without a doubt, family plays a critical role in player development. Navigating the youth football system and various “pathways” (for want of a better word) is something that seems to create a lot of anxiety in parents.
Pay-to-play models the world over, often lead to parents asking for transparency. Clubs or private providers do have a duty to deliver a ‘product’ if families are investing significantly into their child’s football experience.
However, the commercialisation of youth sports also leads to massive issues around the expectation that “my son or daughter is going to ‘make it’”, premature professionalism, pressure on players, or ever-increasing demands on hard-working coaches who become exhausted from the weekly demands of parents.
So how do we go about ensuring that expectations are met on both sides, that parents feel they understand the programme, that coaches can coach (without parents coming over the top on the sidelines) and that players (most importantly) have an enjoyable experience which encourages them to work hard and develop their game?
Three things to consider
- Communicate clearly and honestly: Ensure that you set the tone at the start of the season. What is your programme about? Do you have clear values mapped out and expectations on both sides regarding how parents can support, how they should behave, and what the coaches will deliver?
- Be considered: I have a policy (one that I learned in my time in the academy system in England) that I will never, ever speak about someone else’s child to another parent. Be clear that if there is an issue around selection, game time, or some other conflict, we will only discuss the involvement of the child of the parent, protecting each player and their family.
- Be empathetic: Parents love their kids, we all want the best for our own children and we want to see them grow, develop and succeed. Give parents an audience, work with them, regularly check-in or gauge how their child is doing (beyond results or performance). Are they having a good experience? What concerns do they have? Consider seeking feedback from them as this can assist with defusing anxiety on the sidelines.
One thing for you to try this week.
Consider how you can better engage with parents.
If you’re having problems with sideline behaviour or parents who are frustrated, concerned or worried, you could easily deliver a workshop or presentation in your club or simply with your team as to what you’re trying to achieve as a leader or coach, how they can support and what you need to ensure the kids have a great experience.
One critical resource on the topic.
Check out this superb article from John O’Sullivan on the importance of youth sport serving the needs of the player. John shares great advice on the impact of adult involvement and sports parents on the youth sport experience.
